What's on my mind....

We have a driveway. Finally. I'm thrilled. Hopefully by the end of the summer I will have a fence, patio and walkway to go with it.

I love this second tri-mester energy, but after supper runs out VERY quickly. Lately I love watching The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills online when the chores are done and the kids are asleep and I have a few hours to kill before Darryl comes home and we try and watch whatever hockey or basketball game is on that night online. We really enjoy playoff sports of any kind. We like to jump on the band wagon and act like we know what's been going on all season and be the biggest fans ever.

I love my kids. I love when you just look at your children's faces and your heart could burst because they are simply the most precious thing on earth.

Carter has taken to reading by himself, out loud, his own version of his favourite stories. It is hilarious to watch. He'll sit with the Pinkalicious book and turn each page and point out the pictures he knows, or he'll mimic actions I've done in the past. It's so cute. Hell sit there turning pages and say, Bee, Cho-Cho, Hi (picture of the phone)he'll say Ahhhhhh and grab his cheeks, just like I do when Pinkalicious turns pink. I love that little man. A woman at church looked and him on Sunday and told him when he's older he'll have a string of girls after him and I swear he practically winked at her.

Chloé, my darling girl, sure is feisty these days and I often fast forward to what it will be like when I have TWO ladies in the house. She has been waking up too early and has been grouchy as a result. But she has been LOVING pre-school lately. So excited to learn, and I love it. Thrilled to plant a seed and watch it grow, so happy to ride a pony at Puck's Farm, and to do her "job" at the job table at school. Whatever writing, cutting or pasting is required, she can't wait to it. Even when she comes home and is playing with her barbies, I'll often hear her say one barbie to another "The job table is full, you have to wait your turn" "But I want to do my job now!" It cracks me up.

Now, I am going to vent. Can I tell you, I am thrilled at the prospect of being home for at least a year, possibly two, as we get ready to welcome Baby Claire, but I am so NOT ready to jump back into the Mommy world 24 hours a day. Not the mommy world within the 4 walls of my home, I love that world. In fact I'd be quite happy to stay there, it's the mommy world outside of there. The groups, the park, my neighbourhood, the pre-school mommy crowd at Chloe's school, the parents I hear talking at the school I work at, it's all that I dread. I don't really fit, I've tried to fit, but I've decided I don't really want to fit.

I have a few really good friends at work, all my mom's age with grown kids of their own, and I really enjoy their company. My best friend doesn't have children. My sisters don't have children, and these are the people that I would like to spend the majority of my time with. Don't get me wrong, I do have a few good friends who have children, mostly people from my church, and it is always refreshing to get there and break up the day with some adult conversation and some socializing for my kids.

There are just some things I just can't stand. I feel like their are so many mothers everywhere I go that would like to convince you why what they do is best. Why their kid is the best. Why their brand of toilet paper is the best. It gets exhausting. And boring. And I find myself wishing I was back at work with women who tell me it doesn't matter when they crawl, walk, talk, they'll be fine and just enjoy them.

What's wrong with celebrating or at least just accepting each others differences? Wouldn't it be so boring if we were all the same? Maybe your brand of toilet paper is BEST for YOUR family? Maybe you know what's best for your kids and I know what's best for mine. And what's with opening conversations with controversial statements? It doesn't always matter if it is exactly how you feel, sometimes it's just rude.

I wouldn't open a conversation with:

"I don't think you need to breastfeed longer than one year, I breastfed my son a lot longer than my daughter and she is WAY healthier. I love the smell of bleach after I clean my house with it and I wouldn't use anything else. I would never use a midwife because I want some with MD at the end of their name delivering my baby thank you very much. I don't think boys will be boys is an excuse for bad behaviour. I think kids need a bedtime at a reasonable hour and I think that there are certain vaccines that are a must for children or we're all going to end up with Polio and I don't appreciate when parents choose not to and put MY children who aren't old enough for the shots at risk."

All true statements (in my eyes) NOT necessary to bring up in the backyard when our kids are playing nicely and we are enjoying a lovely afternoon! I'm not going to convince a mother who believes the opposite of everything I stated is true, nor is she going to convince me any different, and that's OK! What's wrong with "What are your plans for the weekend?" or "Nice weather we're having, eh?"

I find the Mommy-Group game exhausting. And third time around, I'm not going to play anymore. If I end up with socially inept toddlers, so be it.

This sounds much more rational in my head. When I read this it sounds like a bit of a hysterical, pregnancy induced rant, so I am going to quit while I'm ahead. My fingers and ankles are swollen, my varicose veins are throbbing. It's time for The Real Housewives.